GET A MEXICAN TO DO IT....

It’s been a few days since I have written here, sorry guys my mind is active, just a little busy.

Note the picture to the left of our audience…. It’s our friend actually mowing his own yard! What a novel idea. The reason why I posted this pictures is that I’m getting tired of people making comments whenever they see us working in our yard… maybe it’s in our blood, but I for one like to enjoy a beautiful day by taking mother natures wonders and shaping them up. So this is my topic for the day.

A friend of ours dropped by today as I was on my knees picking the weeds from the planter box in the front yard. God forbid my neighbors see these nasty things, when he asked me “Why don’t you hire a Mexican to do that?” Needless to say my pinche little pocho brain began to smolder like a hot tortilla on the grill! My response to him, “So hire a Mexican as in as a person from Mexico (our motherland) itself?… or someone who is brown and standing around the HomeDepot looking for trabajo? Complete silence as usual when I stated such a fact. As mentioned above I enjoy working in my yard. As for his comment, what really gets me is some people actually believe everyone who is a day labor is Mexicano. Don’t they realize that these hard working people could be from El Salvador, Guatemala, Brazil, maybe even (if they are from the extreme part) Argentina! Us brown people come in many shapes and forms and are from many parts of the world. Through modern ways of travel we know get here faster and from further parts of the world. We no longer swim across the border, we ride first class on trains, planes and hybrid automobiles. If your really a smart neo techo person, you can use the internet super highway to hire a day laborer, just go to: www.pinchebush.com. There you can not only get one legally for 90 days but they come with their own papers to get back! Oh did I mention that this also includes a round trip ticket on Pocho Airlines first class with meals included! No more picking your day laborer from the airport with his lunch leftovers of chorizo sandwiches that his abuela pack for the long flight… oh the smell! So come all ye gringos and put your fingers to the key board and get moving before your lawn gets out of control!

Enough for today, it’s time for bed. I hope you write back, I am still waiting on good chisme! Don’t be afraid just type away.

Mandog!

NOTHING LIKE GOOD MEXICANO FOOD!

17 years of amazing comida! Oh sorry, was just relaxing and thinking about my wonderful steak picado burrito I had for lunch over at “LA ABEJA”.

I have been going to La Abeja for about 17 years now. I first went with my friends Lucia, Martha and Ivy way back when my nephew was still in high school. The first time I went I thought it was a gay hang out but later figured out that the art community from Mt. Washington were frequent gobblers of Roy’s family establishment. The food here is amazing and the beans are the absolute best in town! I highly recommend La Abeja not only for its authentic Mexican food but for it’s all around friendly atmosphere.

Way back when at Abeja you would find Roy’s mother sitting behind the counter eyeing and enjoying the wide variety of cliental. She was a wonderful person. She instructed her family members working at the restaurant not to turn down a hungry sole even if they couldn’t afford to pay. Now that was a woman with a big heart. Roy’s two daughters and son worked the tables. These kids have seen EVERYTHING under the sun by working at Abeja… even us weekend wacko’s. Almost every Saturday Lucia, Martha, Ivy and myself would go eat breakfast and enjoyed our weekly chisme… often the chisme was so funny that we laughed out crying and at times got very loud. We actually developed a fan club. People would ask Roy what days we came so they could sit there and listen to our wild stories of local politicals and people in our wonderful city of the angels. Abeja was the hot spot for local city officials and their staff.

Through the years not much has changed at La Abeja except the girls don’t work there anymore, Roy, Jr. is still there as does Tia Gloria. If you visit La Abeja make sure you give Tia Gloria a big tip and a big kiss~ She is a special lady. And be prepared for some amazing food, and watch your guard as you NEVER know who might be sitting behind you, so keep your chisme cool!

Bon appetit.

La Abeja is located at 3700 N. Figueroa St., Los Angeles, CA 90065 (Mt. Washington).
323.221.0474
Open Wed-Sat’s 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.
Sundays 8:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m.
Mondays 8:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m.

AND DON’T EXPECT CHIPS cause they don’t serve em.

Until tomorrow,
mandog

A HARD DAY WAS TODAY.....

I spent most of the morning and early afternoon at my friend Ivy Orta's home helping her father Jose do some chores around the house, I owe Ivy for many things in my life…. She is a TRUE friend and always there. Ivy is only person who can put ANYONE in there place just by looking at them, she keeps us all in check! I love you Ivy.

Nothing much to yap about today, Florida won the big dance yesterday. I was cheering for Ohio St., but I must admit that Florida had the better team and played hard and wanted it more.

I got this great picture of my friend Rachel Braver. Rachel works for GLAD, Greater Los Angeles Agency on Deafness, Inc. Many people confuse it with the other GLADD which is a Gay & Lesbian organization. She is the Director of Public Relations and does a fine job at it. She is very inspirational and also is a good friend when times are hard. She will pick you up and stand behind, reminding one how we can accomplish our goals if we set your minds to it. Rachel also has wonderful parents, Sarah and Morty! They are the most wonderful people, they are always happy to sit you down to a good Jewish spread… so if you ever get invited out with them DON’T EAT until you get there cause there will be plenty at their table. Check out the picture of Rachel B. with Eric Estrada!

Speaking of GLAD, it saddens me that they often do not get the sponsorships or attention that other non-profits seem to flourish with. They are located here in the hip and trendy community of Eagle Rock and have many events through the year. One of the best is the House of Blues yearly fundraiser. Check out their website www.gladinc.org and find out more on how you can support our Deaf and Hard of Hearing community and if any of you are in a position to supply corporate sponsorship for any of there events please extend your hand- your hands are the voice to those who don’t hear.

Ok guys that’s it, not much chisme today but what’s here is all true!

Peace

MONDAY, MONDAY'S

It's Monday and the big game is on tonite, not the game I wanted but still the game. Ohio St. vs. Flordia. Not because Florida beat UCLA but I think I am rooting for Ohio St. My reason simple that they are the Big 10 and I think the East coast teams get too much hype. GO BUCKEYES!!!!

This morning I volunteered my eye for color by helping our friend Manuela find a good color for a dress Ronn is making for her. We went to Michael Levine’s downtown. It was an adventure as she had her young daughter with her, Antonia who is on spring break. I had to make sure the things that came out of my mouth were suitable for a 12 year old… especially since she is a super chigona from El Serreno who is attending Claybourne in San Marino and God forbid she picks up one of my xicano slang words and gets the boot at school for being brown and having attitude… “Ayi Dios!”.

The adventure was fun but all the time I had my eye on one of those hotdogs that they ladies make on their little carlitos wrapped in bacon and dripping with all that fat… boy did it make me hungry. Well needless to say I found out that I was not the only one who was craving one… but we were good and bypassed them.

I am always happy to see all the creative mother’s who still go and buy beautiful fabrics in which to create their daughters/sons/husbands/comadres/compadres/tio/tias/etc. etc. mas y mas ropas (boy that’s hard to type). My mind just images all kinds of things about them, where they live, how they live and why the hell would they choose that fabric? But it puts me in the mood to be more creative. I also found it fascinating that after all these years we Latino’s have been in the city of the angeles and the pinche manikins still have no curves… well at least in front, for some reason they all had really big behinds… but very flat fronts! What’s up with that? I kept on looking at Manuela (who is blessed with… well you know) and these manikins and the styles on them and thinking “I hope the front stretch as good as the back”.

LATE BREAKING NEWS FROM JENNY LENS.. “the girl with the camera eye”

Mark,

PASSOVER!!! It’s Passover! Loved the blog, but you need to add line breaks between paragraphs.

You sure have a lot to say all at once.

I couldn’t stop laughing. You have a wonderfully lively way of expressing yourself.

Will you please translate!! Lots don’t know what is LGBT (I just found out this weekend cos I saw a ref somewhere about Jewish LGBT actors/actresses and found a list on wikipedia). What’s chiladas and chanclas and tres flores and nagas! Damnit, I hate it when people use terms that drive me to wikipedia.

We don’t all live in your world, but we want to share it. And you want people to respond. Many many people in LA and elsewhere have no idea what these words mean. And if you want to reach people, don’t make them feel like they are being deliberately excluded.

Love love love you.

Talk to you soon.

OK FOR MS. LEN’S SAKE AS WELL AS OTHERS:

I have copies this from “The Adventures of Connie Chancla” so I can not take the credit but it’s a Calo Glossary of Slang, Profanity & Vulgar Expressions ©Maria Elena Gaitan, 1998.

The following vocabulary is a humorous sampling of slang, profanity and vulgar expressions regarding Chicanos, Mexicanos, women, workers and immigrants. Profanity might well be considered a substitute for war. Instead of hurling a stone, spear or bullet, we hurl an epithet, an insult or a ‘palabrota’. So, if the chancla fits…

AGACHADO: Underdog; stoop laborer; oppressed person.

¡AY GüEY!: (Literally) Oh You Ox! Oh you Beast of Burden! A stupid person.

ALAMBRISTA: An undocumented Mexican human being who came across the border by crawling under the barbed-wire or ‘Alambre’.

AZTLAN: The Capital of Pocholandia.

BEANER: A derogatory term used by gringos towards Chicanos, meaning half-breed, ill-bred, a degenerate expression of North American culture, particularly in the Southwestern United States. (See POCHO).

CHANCLA: An old shoe.

CHINGAR: To strike, hurt, oppress, irritate or #uck someone over: ¡Ya no chingues!

CHUNTARO: (See ¡NO SEAS INDIO!).

ESQUINEROS: (Literally) Corner People, a term referring to day laborers in the U.S.

JAROCHO: The offspring of Indian and African parents.

JODER: (see CHINGAR).

LA LINA: (Literally) The Line, The U.S. /Mexico Border.

LA MIGA: A term denoting the armed border military apparatus otherwise known as the U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS).

LA TUYA: (no not Michael Jackson’s sister!) Yo Mama!

MOJADO: Wet; Wet Back

NACO: A derogatory term used by City Slickers to denote County Bumkins as unsophisticated, rural, or country. (See ¡NO SEAS INDIO!).

¡NO SEAS INDIO!: (Literally) Don’t be an Indian! Don’t be stupid!

PELADA RASCUACHE: A coarse rowdy woman.

PELADA RASCUACHE CABRONA: A coarse rowdy mean woman.

PELADA RASCUACHE DE BUEN CORAZON: A coarse rowdy compassionate woman.

PELADA/PELADO: Coarse; poor; low-class person.

PENDEJA/PENDEJO: A person of limited intellectual capacity; a dummy.

PINCHE: A derogatory qualifier that can be used as a noun or adjective used in a similar fashion to the English profane word ‘#ucker’ as in ‘#ucked-up’ or ‘#ucking’: ie ‘No seas pinche;’ ‘La pinche migra.’ The word pinche can also be diminutive or augmentative as in ‘Pinchisismo Ron Unz’.
Side note on this one: If you want to a good laugh (those of use who grew up with the word ‘pinche’) then check out http://www.pinche.hvdgm.nl/

POCHA/POCHO: A derogatory term used by Mexicans towards Chicanos, meaning half-breed, ill-bred, a degenerate expression of Mexican culture in language, dress, manner and attitude. (See BEANER).

POCHOLANDIA: The place where Pochas and Pochos flourish in harmony with La Madre Tierra.

OK, that ought to catch those of you who don’t know the slang up to date!

Finally on this day I want to plug my good friends Cita y Ricardo. They are truly amazing people. As artist their music is not only unique but is visually a must to see if they are playing in town. I will write more about Cita y Ricardo tomorrow.

OK that’s it kiddies… as for the chisme of the day, well I think enough was written above so now tell me yours!

Mark

Next year BRUINS!

Well I gave up my Final Four weekend of drunkenness and chingasos to help our dear friend Jimmy Szabo move some nice furniture he bought from Buena Vista Furniture to his new home just outside of Phoenix, AZ. I told him I would only help (or rather we as my partner Ronn is the one who actually volunteered us) if I could watch the games on Saturday. He assured me that was not a problem. He failed to tell me that he didn’t have the TV connected to cable nor antenna! Pinche Jim!!!!! So I made Jimmy boy go to the local hardware store and buy a cheap and sleezly antenna that plugs into the back of the set… I prayed all the way back to his house from the hardware store that the VOG (Virgin of Guadalupe) would bless us with at least somekind of picture… even if it meant grain or lines through the picture (hell after one too many Volka cranberry it all looks the same). Well it worked and I got to watch the games… I was no expecting all my wishes to come true that day, at least I got to watch the game as for UCLA continuing to the final game… next year. They are a very good team, it just was not their day. BRUINS 12th NCAA championship in 2008! As for Phoenix... well all I can say the only exciting thing this weekend was driving by a Mexican Restaurant named "Aunt Chilada's"!!!! What a great name! Maybe I will open up the male version and name it "Male Nudo" like Menudo- hmmm I better think about this people would then think it's a male strip club... forget it.
Speaking of Buena Vista Furniture, if you haven’t been to Ruthie and Joseph’s store, please do so. Visit their website at:www.buenavistafurniture.com They have AMAZING pieces of furniture from all over the world and their prices are the BEST. I know my friend Josefina Lopez is a frequent visitor, I saw many pieces from their at her beautiful new home in Silver Lake. She and her husband Emmanuel celebrated Josefina’s 38th birthday party a couple of weeks ago and introduced to the Xicano world their extremely bonito casa… It’s full of color and has a nice big yard with beautiful trees to shade it.
Speaking of color… oh sorry not color but rather black and white, my best and most creative friend in the whole wide world “Jenny Lens” just sent me an e-mail that had me flashing back and laughing! During the years 1976-1980 something Jenny used her gift with her camera eye to photograph many of LA’s punk bands… the groundbrakers of what we now call punk didn’t even get noticed until this crazy Jewish girl with a big afro and a hot camera started photographing them and getting them published all over the world. In her e-mail Jenny was informed by a fan that she was seen in the audience at the Grace Jones taping of midnight special Go Grace… I clicked on the URL she sent from You-Tube and low and behold there was our girl with the camera eye doing what she did best… shooting the music! More on Mz. Lens in next posting but please visit her web site at www.jennylens.com as she is one of the most amazing photographers of all time!
The picture is of me and Divine, Jenny took this I think in 1977... boy was I skinny!!!! And had a hell of a lot more hair!

OK kids no chisme today… It’s Sunday, God told us to be good and not spread Chisme on Sunday’s or the Mano Mochada will pull our legs when we are sleeping.

Mandog!